It’s been a while… again. I’ve been laying low due to COVID, but things are finally getting back to normal. Not to mention I’m vaxxed, waxed and ready to go. Just in time, because the squirrels are coming out of the trees. And by that I mean things are nuts. By this point, I have nearly two dozen girls who continue to creep on my social media. These are girls that I’ve matched with or dated, or both. Either things fizzled out, or there was no in-person chemistry, yet they continue to like my posts or view my Instagram stories.
However, one of them suddenly came alive and asked if we could start chatting again. Oh? We’d stopped talking while back after I told her I was looking for something casual. Well, I guess time in quarantine had her thinking differently because now she was considering it. There was a catch though – she confessed that she was a 31yo virgin. That in itself is not a problem, but she was just too green for me. Had barely kissed anyone, and kept grilling me on my sexual habits and experience (interspersed with queries about my favorite color and shit like that). Then she wanted to sext and exchange videos, and to send her videos of me cumming. Red flag. Anytime I ever entertained sexting with anyone prior to meeting, it almost always was a waste of time. Always some reason or excuse why they weren’t ready to meet, so it never lead to anything. Ended up as colossal prickteases. I wasn’t going down that road again.
Then I got a Facebook friend request from a girl a I went to elementary school with. Throwback chick. We had fun catching up via Facebook Audio, but then it got to the point where she would message and then call me every time I was online, usually within minutes of logging on and most often at 11 or 12 at night. And she was married, so what gives? But for months my Facebook Messenger looked like this, and she was undaunted by my lack of response:
Finally, I got a message from one of my Instagram followers. She went to my gym and wanted to discuss something with me, so we met for lunch near my workplace. Turns out she has an OnlyFans and was looking for a guy to make videos with. For those of you not familiar with OnlyFans, it’s a subscription-based social media site where content creators allow their “fans” to see their pics and videos for monthly fee. It can and is used by all manner of artists and musicians, but is mainly known for its usage by porn stars and budding amateurs – like the girl from my gym. She actually pulled out her phone and showed me some of her… work. Believe it or not, I’d thought about doing porn since before I even fully understood what sex was. And I’d consider doing something like this with the right person (assuming I’d get a cut of the earnings too), but I just didn’t find her attractive. Plenty of other guys did, though, going by how many followers she had on the site. Whatever makes their dicks hard, I guess.
Overall, it’s funny how it’s never the ones you wished were interested in you, and the ones you are interested in don’t even know you exist.
I redownloaded Tinder and Bumble a while after that and started swiping again. That went on for a few weeks. Nobody really struck my fancy, and then I finally hit it off with someone new. Next thing I knew, I was going on my first date in a long time…