I scored two more dates over the weekend.  I never heard back from Art Girl, so I hit up OKC with determination and didn’t stop until I had two more girls lined up.

The first date was Saturday night with TV Girl.  She was 29, worked in television production and had an offensive sense of humor on par with my own.  We wrote each other substantial messages, which was a good sign.  I asked her out on a date and we met at a bar halfway in between our towns.  She had just gotten back from having dinner in the city with her family so we didn’t meet until midnight.

I was amazed that she was up for meeting so late at night. Everyone else I know heads home by 9 or 10 PM because “I have work in the morning.”  With my friends I’m just like… you’re working the same shitty job that you had at 22, and back then we’d hang out until 4AM even though you had to be at work three hours later.  Now we have to pull out the appointment book and literally schedule time to see each other.  And once they get married and have kids… forget it.  People aren’t as much fun as they get older.

But I digress.

As I was saying, we met at the bar.  Fun fact: it was the same bar that Teacher and I went to with the other girls in our dance class last year, where I had my first beer and all that.  But that was on a Tuesday.  This time it was a Saturday and the place was a zoo.  Geez.  I could have done without the noise.  I got there two minutes after she did and I met her just inside the door.  I snaked an arm around her waist and gave her a kiss on the cheek and told her it was good to see her.  She looked different in person than in her pictures, but still cute.

She’d already gotten herself a drink, so I got one for myself and then we found a table near the back where it was somewhat quieter.  We started swapping stories but she seemed to dominate the conversation.  Very bubbly and outspoken, and slightly brash at times.  I mused that she’d probably be more interested in a guy a little edgier than myself.

The other patrons got noisier and rowdier as the night wore on, and then a fight broke out at the next table.  There was a gaggle of girls sitting there along with a couple of guys, and then another guy came along and said something to them. One of the guys at the table stood up and they were toe-to-toe and in each other faces.  I’d seen enough Worldstar Hip Hop videos to know how this was going to go down.  Sure enough, five seconds later one gave the other a shove, and it was on.  They were wrestling on top of tables and rolling around the floor, knocking chairs over and sending glasses crashing.  I grabbed TV Girl and pulled her aside as they came within three feet of us.  And of course people were pulling out their phones to film the whole thing.  It went on for a good minute until the bouncers finally arrived and pulled them apart, launching the instigator out the back door.

Shortly afterwards TV Girl said she needed a smoke, so we went out to the back patio where she lit up a cigarette.  Meanwhile the guy who started the fight was yelling on his phone in the parking lot, and then he came charging back inside a few minutes later.  This time the bouncer caught him and hurled him right back out again.  Then the police showed up shortly afterwards there was a big to-do.  TV Girl and I watched the whole show and I kept up a running commentary the entire time.  “See, who says I don’t know how to show a girl a good time?” I joked.

By the time 1:30AM rolled around we were both cold and tired, so we called it a night.  I walked her back through the bar and out the front door.  On the sidewalk I told her I had a nice time with her and wanted to see her again, and that next time we should do dinner – someplace a little quieter.  She said she was up for it.  I gave her a hug and another kiss on the cheek and we parted ways.  I didn’t feel like we really hit it off in person, compared to the spark in our online messages.  But we’ve been texting a little bit since Saturday night so we’ll see what happens.

I didn’t have high expectations for Curly Sue when we got together Sunday afternoon.  Our online conversation was rather lackluster, but she was up for a date so I figured I’d give her a chance.  You never know.  She was 28 and even cuter in person and I was quite taken with her.  I also quite taken with the crepe place I went to with Art Girl so I went back there with Curly Sue – albeit at a different location.

The date went as expected.  It started out okay, but try as I might I just could not come up with a topic that we could run with, apart from discussing her teaching career.  She barely asked me anything about myself in return, though I volunteered plenty of information.  It reminded me irresistibly of my experience with Crush.  They even looked very much alike, now that I think about it.  But it was one of those dates that just plain didn’t work.

Eventually we ran out of things to talk about.  But that didn’t mean I wasn’t interested in seeing her flat on her back in my bed, clawing at the sheets and biting down on my shoulder to muffle herself.   I was at the point where I just felt like saying, “you wanna blow this joint and come back to my place?”  In retrospect I wish I’d been ballsy enough to try that.  Instead I called it an afternoon and we went outside.  I would have gone for at least a hug but she shook my hand just as she did when she met me.  Then we parted ways.  There was no mention of seeing each other again.

However I did text her later that day to tell her she should come over some night this week to watch The Goonies (since that’s one of our favorite movies).   I wasn’t expecting a response, but she actually texted back:  “Hey thanks for the offer, but I don’t think that we’re compatible.  Good luck, I know you’ll find someone perfect for you.” Doubtful I would have gotten a different response had I asked at the end of our date, but at least I gave it a shot.

But those crepes were to die for.  Holy shit.  I was nearing climax as I ate mine.


First dates:  28
Second dates:  3
Third dates:  2
Cancellations:  5
Stood up:  2
First kisses: 1
Sexual experiences:  0.6

26 thoughts on “Double

  1. “I mused that she’d probably be more interested in a guy a little edgier than myself.” Those are my least favorite words in this post. Defeating yourself. I know it’s difficult to not be pessimistic sometimes but be mindful of limiting thoughts

    • Except she was a lot like Sandwich Girl, or whatever I named her. They were very similar in personality and after I met Sandwich Girl she told me she was an intense person and she’s looking for a guy a little edgier. TV Girl seems like the same kind of person.

  2. And yes, you should have absolutely said that. You got nothing to lose, especially if it’s going badly. That might have made you interesting to her. “Wow he’s bold”

  3. You said assumed the first girl wanted someone with intensity… not necessarily. I’ve known women like that go for quieter guys because they are looking for someone to balance them out, to act as a calming influence. Not everybody is the same despite what your PUA cultists here might tell you.

    I didn’t feel like we really hit it off in person, compared to the spark in our online messages. But we’ve been texting a little bit since Saturday night so we’ll see what happens.

    Sometimes these things start slowly. Not every woman wants or expects fireworks on date one and are happy to take things slowly. Again, don’t assume everyone wants the same thing.

    As for the second girl, people like that are infuriating. Impossible to talk to because she doesn’t know how to hold a conversation, she’ll convince herself it’s the men she dates who are at fault for not finding enough stuff to talk about.

  4. I’ve always been baffled by people who smoke and live up north. That cigarette must be really amazing if you’re willing to freeze your titties or testicles off.

    • When I was at college in upstate NY guys would stand outside in 20 degree weather in shorts and flip flops having a smoke. Either smoking makes you warmer or they were too lazy and nicotine-addicted to bother putting on proper clothing.

  5. I just stumbled upon your blog and I love it. I started with the most recent ones then I went all the way back to 2013 to see how it began. The more I read the more I wanted to be with you, but then I reached a point where I found you didn’t like tattoos and was saddened. I really wish I’d meet a guy like you near me! I’m rooting for you though.

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