I’ve grown a lot over the past year: personally, professionally… but not physically, unfortunately.  I’ve been working so hard that I’ve lost most of my gains.  But I’ll be able to rectify that now that I have new equipment that will cut down on my time and effort.

The growth in my business excites me the most.  I started doing landscaping jobs on the side for extra cash when the real estate market went south a few years back.  I never imagined that it would morph into my new full-time job.  Had I known that would happen, I would have developed a business plan.  Instead I found myself working very hard for very long and for very little.  I struggled with inadequate tools, I didn’t know the most efficient way to do things, and I had no idea what to charge.  Quite frankly, I just didn’t know what I was doing.  It took me a long time to learn some very obvious and painful lessons.

The most important lessons I learned were knowing my worth and knowing when to say no.  After I got a handle on those things and developed a plan, my business really turned around.  I took on a whole slate of new customers, my income went up, and I’m finally afforded the opportunity to do things I’ve wanted to do.

One of those things is traveling.  I spent a weekend in Virginia.  I went to Chicago and meet JBlondie.  And then there was California.  California was a big deal for me.   I’ve spent weekends away, but that was first time I got on a plane and actually went somewhere for several days on a real vacation.  And I’m only getting started.  I’m definitely going back to California, and over the next few months I have stops planned in Florida, North Carolina, Connecticut, Massachusetts, and Colorado.  So take note, any of you fellow bloggers, if I’m headed to your part of the country and you’re interested in meeting The Unfortunate Virgin Male…

This has been a year of changes and firsts:  New traveling and experiences. Major business expansion.  Bought a second vehicle.  Added another instrument to my repertoire.  Next week I’m joining a new dance group.  This past weekend I hosted friends at my place for the first time.  I took care of some long-standing projects around the house.  I’m even getting some new furniture!  Go me.  And I feel that even more exciting things await in the months ahead.

I’ve been feeling especially good about myself lately, so I felt the time was right to get back out there.  Yes, back out in the dating market.  Back to good ol’ OKC, the bastion of all my prior success (to use the term loosely).  Actually, my recent success is partly to blame for my troubles as I’ve been isolated in a work bubble for so long.  Construction, real estate, landscaping… it was hard enough to encounter anybody my age working in those fields, let alone anyone of the opposite sex.

The only time in my life that I had girlfriends was when I was in school – when I was in contact with a large number of my peers.  When school ended I lost all of that, and then I put my nose to the grindstone and didn’t look back.  My early 20s was a freewheeling period of not looking and not caring whether I found love or sex.  I was young and reminded myself that there was plenty of time for that later on.  But then I got into my late 20s – around the advent of this blog – and realized, “um, shit, I’m getting left behind here…”

I’ve been a real late bloomer, and things are proving tougher than I thought.  It doesn’t help that I’m coming up against girls who have at least several years of experience on me.  My last relationship was at 17, so I feel like I’m only 18 or 19 in dating years.  It’s a bit of a weird place to be when you’re 30.  But I’m in a better place than I was.  Now that I have some distance I’ve been reflecting on my dating storm from last year.  Now I feel like I can approach dating with a little more self-assurance and confidence than before.  Not that I ever felt I was lacking in confidence, but I’m at a point where – if a girl says “we can be friends” – I can stand tall and say, “no that’s not what I want.”  Because it isn’t.

Aside from that I’m just trying to go with the flow and not think too far ahead.  I still feel like this could be my year, though.

I’m also getting a little behind on my blog.  Things have been happening since I started writing this post, things I must update you all on.

Talk soon…


22 thoughts on “Growth

  1. Man, wish I had known. I live in Virginia. I would totally have taken you to dinner. Oh well, if you’re ever back hit me up. Also, congrats on your business success!

  2. It feels good, doesn’t it, to see the hard work finally begin to pay off. I’m about to write a similar post to this so I guess you read my mind.

  3. I am from Florida. I hope to meet you IRL soon! I have grown a lot too, but my dating life is lacking and I never had a gf since my LDR which ended over 2 years ago. I am doing grad school in hopes of getting better prospects for a job in the future. I never get much attention from OkCupid, and I get visitors, send messages, but hardly get any replies, same goes with I guess I am going to be a late bloomer no matter what and will be lacking in the romance/dating/relationship department. Yes, a lot of my peers are generally more successful in that department, partially because of luck I assume and finding the right one. I think a lot of romance success is about luck.

  4. I love reading about all this growth! The landscaping biz…the return to OKC and friends at your place w/furniture soon to happen?!? OMG…it’s like a whole new Duck! Love, Love, Love all of it!! ❤

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