I raised the glass to my lips in quiet anticipation. And as soon as the hour struck, I took a tentative sip. Two things changed at that moment: I became a 30-year-old virgin, and I had my first beer.
Yes, my first beer ever. I’ve had wine, I’ve had champagne, I’ve had vodka, I’ve had a tequila shot once… all very sparingly, but never an actual beer. It just never appealed to me. Of course, when I was at the age when I could have started drinking, there weren’t options like there are today. You know – all this craft beer and other bullshit. There was just Budweiser. I always figured that if beer tasted like it smelled, then I wasn’t interested.
But this beer I was having was quite scrumptious. It went down very easily. And fifteen minutes later, I finally understood why people drank. Alcohol really does work wonders as a social lubricant. Not that I needed it on this occasion, but nonetheless I was more relaxed than ever. And giggly. Holy Jesus. I was laughing up a storm, and nothing hilarious was happening.
The girls were quite amused by my antics, though.
Ahh, yes… the girls.
A couple of weeks ago I came up with a brilliant idea. I suggested that we should all go out for drinks after this week’s dance class, especially since this is the last time we’re meeting before the holidays. Everybody was all for it, and Dancer Chick seemed super-stoked. Dancer Chick, the cute girl in my class in whom I was interested, but didn’t appear interested in return. That didn’t mean that I didn’t still have my eye on her, because I did.
I thought this would be a great opportunity for her to get to know me a little better and to talk outside of class for a change. That part went as well I could have hoped. And I took her enthusiasm for my proposed outing as a good sign, especially since there were only four of us going: her, myself, our dance teacher, and the other girl in the class (whom I’ve dubbed Teacher and Married Girl respectively).
Then something interesting happened. I’m probably reading too much into things as usual, and it’s probably nothing, but I feel like it’s worth mentioning.
As I was getting ready to take my first sip, Dancer Chick pulled out her phone to take a picture. Just before she could take the snap, Teacher ran over and put her arms around me and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
Whoa. I turned quite red, but thankfully we were in a bar so it was dark and nobody noticed. And that wasn’t the only time she did that, either. She hugged and kissed me at least two more times throughout the night, and my memory is a little hazy (yes, even after one beer) but I’m pretty sure she even ruffled my hair once as she walked past.
She’s the same age as me. She informed us that night that she broke up with her boyfriend a few months ago. I always thought she was hot, but I never paid her that much attention because she had been unavailable. Now that I know she’s single, she’s become even more attractive to me. And now – due to her actions – I can’t help but wonder…
After we all parted ways and wished each other a Merry Christmas, I went home to bed. I was so delirious with lust I could barely sleep, and when I did sleep I had all kinds of sex dreams about her. I’m even willing to overlook her Italian Syndrome. She’s only part Italian, but that’s the part that wins out. She’s talks very loud and very fast. Yappity yappity yappity boppity-bada-bing-bada-bop. But she’s a lot livelier than Dancer Chick, which is a plus.
I’ve met girls like her before, and after a while I learned not to read too much into anything because some girls are just touchy-feely like that and that’s the way they are with everyone and it doesn’t mean a thing. But in any case, she has me all hot and bothered and curious. Next class is not until the first week of January, and the wait is going to kill me. I’m very much interested in her. And I’m still a little interested in Dancer Chick… but I feel like I should just forget about her – I can do better than someone who doesn’t exhibit any real outward signs of interest. Teacher is more my speed. Energetic, outgoing, vocal, no filter, and she owns her own dance school so she’s an entrepreneur like myself. Good deal.
In the meantime, I’ve been reflecting on how far I’ve come in just a short year. At 29 I was virtually dateless. Now I’m 30 with 30 dates under my belt, along with some making out and some titty action. That’s the most action I’ve seen since high school, which really isn’t saying much. So I’ve come a long way since then, and a long way since I’ve started this blog.
I don’t really have any plans for this point forward. I’ve taken down my online dating profiles, with no real desire to go back there anytime soon. I’ve had my fill for now so I’m just going to take a break. Time for something different.