Two more dates this past week.  The first was with Burger Girl 2. She professed a love for cheeseburgers, and since the vast majority of girls on OKC enjoy what I call “rabbit food,” that got my attention immediately. Our first-date was a no-brainer. Burgers it was.  When she arrived the first thing I noticed that she was way heavier than her pictures indicated. And she was somewhat shy and awkward. Nonetheless we had a good conversation, and after our meal we took a walk around the plaza. I called it a night shortly afterwards. We both said “it was nice meeting you” and went our separate ways. No attraction. No spark. No big deal. But the burgers were to die for. Oh my God.

Thursday night I went on a date with Pharmacy Girl. Piercings, tattoos, not really my type. But that’s what I’ve been doing on OKC lately: talking to all kinds of girls, including ones that probably aren’t my type. My line of thinking is, let me talk to them anyway just to make sure. You never know who someone might turn out to be. So everybody been’s getting a second look. The fact that I’ve been expanding my horizons on the site is probably what’s been contributing to my new-found success in landing dates. Besides, I want to go on as many dates as possible. This is how I’ll get better at it while figuring out what I’m looking for (and not looking for).

Early in our online conversation, Pharmacy Girl mentioned that she just gotten out of a really long-term relationship – something she said tends to freak people out, so she wanted to get that out of the way. I’m not exactly sure why that would freak anybody out. And how or why does something like that even come up? The past is the past, so why do you need to discuss old relationships when starting a new one? I don’t know, maybe that’s just me. Maybe this is what people do?

But she thinks that would freak people out? Heh, I can top that. Since I didn’t think she was my type, I figured, “Hey, fuck it. Let’s tell her I’m a virgin and see what she thinks. Just for shits and giggles.” You know what? It didn’t freak her out. On the contrary, she was rather intrigued and asked me a lot of questions about it. Then she told me she was coming up with all sorts of ideas on how to corrupt me. Oh really? She also shared some details about her own sexual history. Maybe a bit too much information.

Anyway, we ended up going out to an Italian restaurant. We found plenty more to talk about, especially since we both have crazy dads. She found me quite funny and laughed uproariously at my stories, much to the chagrin of the other patrons. We also swapped obscene jokes, again to the chagrin of the other patrons, but neither one of us seemed to care.  Things went smoothly, things were comfortable… overall it was one of the better dates I’ve been on. It was raining when I drove her back home, and I walked her to the door under the cover of my umbrella. A really small umbrella. (Pro tip: the smaller the umbrella, the closer the girl.) I could have – and probably should have – gone in for the kiss, but I still wasn’t quite sure how I felt about her. So I gave her a hug instead. From what I learned beforehand, I was probably the first guy she didn’t have sex with on the first date.

While I wasn’t sure whether I was interested, I was still intrigued and wanted a second date to help me decide. We’ve been talking ever since but we’ve been unable to find a time and day that works for both of us. And now it seems the conversation is tapering off. A second date may or may not happen. And you know what? I’m perfectly fine with that. If it doesn’t work out, I’ll simply move onto the next one. As it is, there are three more girls I’m working on getting dates with, and another three I’m talking to and trying to get a feel for. It’s very likely that I’ll another date or two for this coming week. I’m very happy because this is exactly how I want to spend my summer – going on lots of dates and learning about myself in the process.

Finally, I’ve decided to add a date counter to the end of my blog posts (I may do this retroactively as well). I thought it would be a good way for everybody to keep track.

First dates:  9
Second dates:  0
Cancellations:  2
Stood up:  1
Sexual experiences:  0.5

27 thoughts on “Food

  1. I think it’s good you’re opening your horizons a little bit! If you stick to just your “type” you could miss out on a lot of great girls. D was not my type at all an it’s been great so far.
    And haha piercing girl sounds cool. And you would hate me then cuz I have open mouth syndrome. I told D pretty much every bit of my past sexual life. Ha. I’m just very open about myself sometimes.

  2. I like the scorekeeper/tracking idea. I still think it’s odd that you’ve never had a second date…not odd on your part, just strange that 9 gals didn’t want to give another chance or get to know you better. There’s something to be said for immediate chemistry, but it’s also possible to miss out if that’s *all* you’re looking for. I think if I ever dated I’d want to go on at least 2 per guy so I could make a more informed decision, unless they said or did something that made it clear we wouldn’t get along together.

    • That’s fairly common. I am now in a relationship and met my now girlfriend (my first post-divorce relationship) on OKCupid. Of the 20 women I met, only 4-5 went to a second date; just two went to a third date. There were far more that I wanted to keep seeing.

      It’s the kid in a sweetshop attitude – it seems to overtake people.

      • Okay, thanks for sharing. I’ve not been on any dates for about 9 years or so…and the 3 I went on were only single dates because the guys were way too eager to have sex/do heavy petting.

        I think I’d do 2 dates just on principle nowadays.

    • I agree, it’s not that they have had a long-term relationship, it is the “just” part that sets my alarm bells ringing. Though time doesn’t matter, it’s important to get a feel whether the person you are going on a date with is emotionally ready.

  3. I totally get where you’re coming from. It’s nice to know men have this issue as well…you like the person…they’re cool…but at the same time are you interested? hmmmm very interesting UVM.

    P.S. She’s gonna be WAY too freaky in bed for you to start off with…I say focus on the other dates. LOL.

  4. I find it odd when people bring up their immediate pasts on date 1. I have a girlfriend who always asks men on the first date their relationship history. Whereas I have no interest in knowing, unless it comes out organically.

  5. I’ll eventually write a post about this, but. Have you heard of this new show: Married At First Sight? Check it out. It’s on the fyi channel, a subset network of A&E, and it was formally the bio channel. It made me think of you, actually. And not in a bad way! On the other hand, I’m glad the dates are going better even if the chemistry isn’t all there for the time being. Best of luck and I look forward to hearing about future dates.

  6. I think Pharmacy Girl is your better match, since you and her have similar sense of humor, doesn’t mind your virginity, has a crazy father as well She seems to genuinely respect your virginity and was interested, unlike some of the women who grilled you for it in the past. If you two get into a sexual encounter, she seems to be willing to “teach you the ropes”. However the part where she said she had sex with men on first dates sends a red flag, as she might expect you to be sexually aggressive/dominant or might compare/contrast you to past partners, but who knows. Maybe she is very socially adept and knows the ways to have sex with men through her social skills. Other than that red flag, she seems to have a lot of good chemistry with you and similarities. I think you were very polite to burger girl and treated her respectfully. However, I think you and burger girl would make a poor match, since there was no spark or attraction as you said. .

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